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Step 2: Set Up an Account

Tocreate an account, you’ll have to choose a username and password. Most sitesdistinguish between the username which you use to log in and the screen name whichpublicly identifies your profile. In that case, just pick a username andpassword that you won’t forget. If the username is the same as the screen name,as is the case for Match.com, see my comments about screenname . Unfortunately, you may not know ahead of time whether your usernamewill be used as a screen name, but it that happens you can always start overwith a new account. Creating an account is almost always free.

Beforegetting to work on your profile, take a moment to check out your service’soptional settings. For example, most sites allow you to hide your onlinestatus. I always choose this option for two reasons. First, I don’t necessarilywant the people I’m writing to know when and how often I log in. Second, I don’tlike to do the chat thing. If you don’t hide your online status, you’re likelyto receive random requests to chats online.

A teacher friend of TR who dates online is afraid that her students might findher profile, so she doesn’t post her picture. If you need to keep your online datinga secret, a better way to accomplish that is to hide your picture or profile. Most services allow you to post a picture or profile that can only be seen by people you contact. That way,you can show people your photo without having to worry about being outed as an online dater.

Anotheroption to look for is permission to publicize your profile. A friend of mineput her profile up on Nerve Personals and didn’t turn off this setting. Several weekslater, her friends called to heckle her after her picture was printed in TimeOut New York. If you cravethat kind of attention, leave this option on; otherwise, turn it off.

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