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Step 3: Write Your Profile

Thinkof the profile as an advertisement for yourself. The purpose of anadvertisement is to promote and differentiate a product. When an advertisementfails to make its product seem appealing or different from other products, theproduct doesn’t sell. On the other hand, when an advertisement misrepresentsits product, people might buy it, but when they realize that it wasn’t whatthey were looking for, they’ll return it. Your profile must navigate thetension between these same three objectives: differentiation , promotion ,and accuracy . There are things youcan do to differentiate your profile, like posting outlandish pictures ofyourself, but such a tactic may detract from your profile’s appeal. There areways that you can increase your profile’s appeal, like misrepresenting yourheight, weight, and age, but if you exaggerate too much, you won’t get anysecond dates. On the other hand, you can also post too much information. We allhave our warts; you don’t have to show photos of them. (I’m speakingfiguratively, here.)

Ifyou’re serious about trying to get something out of e-dating, put some thoughtinto your profile. You’ll get more posts from more desirable people, whichincreases your odds in the dating gamble. Putting up a shoddy profile is likegoing to party without taking a shower. You may save some time by goingstraight from the gym, but you’re not going to attract any winners when you getthere. So take some new pictures, write a few drafts of your profile, have yourfriends edit it, and for God’s sake, check your spelling. Nothing shouts “I’mstupid” like a mercilessly misspelled profile. Just write answers to thequestions in Microsoft Word, run a spell check, fix the errors, and copy thetext into the web site. It’s not that hard. [Readers:Please don’t hesitate to contact me if you find grammatical errors in thiswebsite.]

Finally,write out your profile before you sign up for your service. Most people searchby recent memberships; they want to see the new blood, not the same oldprofiles. More people will view your profile in the first week of yourmembership than in any other week afterward (see Maximizing Your Visibility ). So if youwant to make the most of your opportunities, ensure that your profile is hot whenyou come out of the starting gate. You can find out the questions that you needto answer before joining a service by viewing the profiles of existing members.

For more detailed advice on how to handle specific aspects of writing a profile,check out the following sections:

• The Screen Name
• The Headline
• The Picture
• The Vitals
• The Essay

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